Invisible Illness Christmas Carols

All right, so they aren’t essays. But it was too hard to resist.

Happy Holidays, everyone!

12 Things at Christmas That Cost Me Spoons Today

The 12th thing at Christmas that cost me spoons today: Hung all the lighting.

The 11th thing at Christmas that cost me spoons today: Agreed to do the baking.

The 10th thing at Christmas that cost me spoons today: Kids are all screaming.

The 9th thing at Christmas that cost me spoons today: It started snowing.

The 8th thing at Christmas that cost me spoons today: Walking and caroling.

The 7th thing at Christmas that cost me spoons today: Trying present wrapping.

The 6th thing at Christmas that cost me spoons today: All the card writing.

The 5th thing at Christmas that cost me spoons today: Ty-ing shoe strings.

The 4th thing at Christmas that cost me spoons today: Can’t say curse words.

The 3rd thing at Christmas that cost me spoons today: Dinner with friends.

The 2nd thing at Christmas that cost me spoons today: Losing my gloves.

The 1st thing at Christmas that cost me spoons today: Setting up that God damn tree.

Pain is Hell

Rushing to the doc’s

For a brand new source of pain

Lis’ning as he talks

Numbing all my brain

It’s all in my head

I’m losing my mind

Can you believe that’s what he said?

A new doc I’ve got to find!

Pain is hell, pain is hell,

why’m I stuck this way?

Oh, what fun it is to cry

And fuss and scream, “You’re a fuckin’ A!”

Pain is hell, pain is hell,

why’m I stuck this way?

Oh, what fun it is to cry

And fuss and scream, “You’re a fuckin’ A!”

Spoonie Night

Spoonie night, cramping night!

Nerves are fraught, what a plight.

Find the Advil, blanket, and ice.

Heating pad, so blessed and nice,

Please, dear God, let me sleep,

Please, dear God, let me sleep.

Spoonie night, painful night!

Muscles twitch - what a sight.

My brain can’t handle one more hour.

In two more hours, I’ll have to shower

,Why can’t I get some rest?

Why can’t I get some rest?

Decked My Toe

Decked my toe on a corner table

Ow ow ow ow ow, ow ow ow ow

Now my nerves have gone unstable

Ow ow ow ow ow, ow ow ow ow

Watch me hop and shriek and stumble

Ow ow ow ow ow, ow ow ow ow

Words I try to somehow fumble

Ow ow ow ow ow, ow ow ow ow

Now the brain fog sets in fully

Ow ow ow ow ow, ow ow ow ow

All my thoughts get soft and wooly

Ow ow ow ow ow, ow ow ow ow

Can’t form even one whole sentence

Ow ow ow ow ow, ow ow ow ow

Have to sit with my resistance

Ow ow ow ow ow, ow ow ow ow

I Wish You a Spoonie Christmas

I wish you a spoonie Christmas

I wish you a spoonie Christmas

I wish you a spoonie Christmas and a pain-free new year

Laughter I bring to you with this site

I wish you a spoonie Christmas and a tolerable new year

Oh, bring us a cure for next year

Or at least better treatments

Maybe a doctor who will listen

And bring it right now!

Laughter I bring to you in the interim

I wish you a spoonie Christmas and a bearable new year